Crones In Training

By Jan Boddie

We Need our Crones

Where are the Crones? Where are the women with years of wisdom stored in their bones, the women who wear badges of honor and courage in their wrinkled skin and slowed down steps? Where are the models for the aging women who stand behind them? Where is the guidance Crones have to offer Maidens in the process of discovering themselves and the Mothers who search to find their place in the world?

Of course some families seek the wisdom of their Crone members, and some Crones are visible to the masses through their inspirational poetry and other mediums. Crones join with elder male residents who live at The Redwoods in Mill Valley on Friday afternoons. As Seniors for Peace they stand up and speak out with passion on their street corner opposite Tamalpais High School. Yet despite the fact that seniors constitute the largest portion of U.S. citizens, and women elders outnumber the men, most Crones are invisible and their gifts remain hidden even from themselves. The premise of Crones in Training is that the entire culture needs its Crones. The absence of their truth and humor is every person's loss.

Remembering Old Wounds

Many women in their fifties, sixties and older wish for a teacher or guide, look for a model or mirror to explain a dissonance and a yearning in their lives. Some grew up with wounded mothers who were lost in the limitations of their era, wounds that many daughters continue to carry but do not understand.

In their formative years the daughters collected new wounds from well-intentioned mothers who wanted their children to be accepted in the societal structure at the time, from teachers and religious leaders who had their own agenda. Now there are countless women entering and in their elder years who live as less than their whole selves. Their spontaneity and intuition, imagination and creativity, passion and power are hidden deep, beyond their reach.

Crones in Training is not group therapy, but it is therapeutic. The Crones gather together in sacred space. They create ritual through symbolic action, use photographs and song, connect with earth and nature. They recall the old stories that burden and diminish, old wounds that rule their lives. In the process, they discover that recognition is a portal for release.

Releasing the Old Story

The Crone sisters support each other as courage is gathered, strength found and vulnerability embraced rather than shunned. Connection with the mental, emotional, physical and spiritual bodies grow as personal yet parallel stories are recalled and shared. The human story of fear and shame, lack of self worth, self-judgment and scarcity, to name a few, are released in the community of others, witnessed with respect.

The process of identifying the old story brings other extraordinary gifts. There is a remembering of a greater self, the authentic self that was present before the wounds pierced the skin and nestled in, made a home in mind and body. There also is a recognition that the wounds were held to assure survival through every youngster's need for acceptance from the adults that surrounded them. The Crones understand there is no need to feel guilt or blame or shame. Quite the opposite, for this is a new era. The old paradigm is dying and a new one is being birthed.

Reclaiming what Sustains

Crones in Training offers support in a community of kindred spirits to be serious, silly and spiritual. Without "shoulds" about thoughts or emotions, there is encouragement to embrace a new learning curve, explore how to be more authentic with less self-judgment, more confidence and self-trust. As the Crones free themselves from the past, there is a realization that they do not need to "figure out" anything and there is no need to "do it all" or "do it" alone.

 Excitement grows as the spaces emptied from release fill with the magnificence of true essence. Reclaiming the authentic self includes identifying gifts to be shared and purpose to be fulfilled. These are honored and declared in the ninth circle as a rite of passage. In the final, tenth circle, the community meets to connect as Crones in Action.

Crones in Action

As Crones heal the past and carry their gifts into the present, their healing energy spirals out to ignite healing in others. Crones in Training is a symbol of all the great and small transitions that are part of being human.

 Margaret summed up her experience: "With the process, shared intention and love in this circle (my personal philosopher's stone), the 'failure' and 'mess' have begun to alchemically transform into wisdom, acceptance and knowing. Lead is gradually turning into gold!" Dawn named the gifts she embraced: "I have received and reclaimed my giving heart, my integrity, my ability to listen, my loyalty, and my leadership. I am a powerful, fierce woman and can carry that gently into the world."

 The Spirit of Crone is rising.

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