5 Steps to Learning To Love Yourself in Order to Heal

By Ana Maria Sanchez

I have surmised that there are 5 Steps to Learning To Love Yourself in Order to Heal, but there is something that comes even before that, and that is awareness. Having the awareness that there is something missing in your life, that there is something not quite right, or something painful that needs healing. I forget who's famous quote this is, but it is a prevalent saying amongst us holistic counselors, "You cannot confront what you are not aware of." which makes perfect sense, right?

This is a universal truth. How are you going to fix something that you don't even know needs fixin', that you don't even know is broken so having that awareness that you are out of alignment is what will bring you to the well of self discovery. Having that awareness is essential to starting on the path to healing and having a healthier happier existence. Knowing that you no longer want to be "here" anymore whatever "here" means to you, is vital.

The First Step: Setting Your Intention, The definition of intention is having a strong purpose or aim accompanied by a determination to produce a desired result. You must set in motion a go getter attitude, an internal drive that propels you toward fulfilling your dreams, your heart's desire. If you are reading this article it is likely that your true heart's desire is to learn to accept and love yourself.  Intention moves the thought of having the life you want from just wishing it to making it real.

Step Two: Self Discovery Through Journaling. A journal is not just a book to keep a bland record of our lives, it's also a tool for self-evaluation and self-improvement. We get a chance to examine our lives as we come to know ourselves through our journal entries. Even if you take your journal and go back and look at it a few days later, you learn things about yourself you didn't know at the time. You begin to understand things about yourself, you gain further awareness about you.

Writing down your thoughts and feelings is a therapeutic activity. Putting pen to paper are tools for your creative expression, writing down your joys and sorrows alike is extremely healing. Journaling can be a mindful process which helps you get in touch with your deepest yearnings, helps you find resolve for problems, and deal with personal issues. Whatever type of painful emotion you are experiencing (grief, sadness, fear, isolation, etc.) expressing yourself in writing can help ease your discomfort. Getting words down on paper can help clear your head of thoughts and ideas that are creating this mental swirl of confusion.

So Each day, or at least a couple times a week intend to just start writing. This process is meant to allow a stream-of-consciousness to pour out of you. It doesn't matter what words or phrases you write down. It doesn't matter if your sentence structure or grammar is good or poor don't worry about misspellings. It doesn't matter this daily exercise is to help clear your brain of mindless clutter and discharge any emotional baggage connected to useless or negative thoughts. It's a way to help release our anger, our worries, our criticisms, and to embrace our hopes and dreams. Those very things that block our creative juices from flowing need an outlet. Writing can be used as a venting tool to get rid of negative thinking.

Step Three: The Importance of Self Help Books, author Charles Jones said it best "You are the same today that you are going to be five years from now except for two things: the people with whom you associate and the books you read." You might want to write that one down. Think of yourself five years from now even just one year from today. If you want yourself to be even brighter, wiser, and more successful than they you are today, you'll want to strongly consider the information that you are allowing yourself to be exposed to. Reading personal development books encourage and inspire you to move ever forward and ahead towards your goal of loving yourself. The books you read directly affect the growth that will or will not take place between the you today and the you tomorrow. So it is is very important to go shop for these treasures and not view them as just some good entertainment but as a contributing force to your higher education and lifelong well being.

Step Four: Getting Out In Nature, The benefits of this are many but how does it help you have more self love? Well it helps you to de stress and feel relaxed which improves your overall sense of well being. It also assists with sensory awareness and mindfulness which makes it easier for us to be able to go even deeper within ourselves. Being in nature offers you an opportunity to be playful, to tap into your inner child that longs to play. I get a sense of fascination when I hug a tree or baby talk to a squirrel. So get yourselves out there at least once a week for a nice stroll amongst the elements.

And Step Five: Seeking Counsel, Louise Hay states that "One Can Not Change a Problem From The Same Mindset It Was Created" which is true how can you fix a situation if you are viewing it from the same angle, with the same perception you had when you ignited it. At times our usual ways of handling problems aren't working so we feel stuck! Counseling provides a safe space where people can be themselves and freely discuss their pain. Helps them to understand their problems to help create different strategies in approaching their dilemma. Counselors help people to see different sides of their problems so that their situation may be improved.

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